Advice Request from Client:

Ever since I had a panic attack about a year ago, something inside me feels permanently off. I used to feel in control, confident, and grounded. Now, I feel like I’m always on edge, like something bad could happen at any moment. Even when I’m not actively anxious, there’s this underlying sense that something isn’t right. I avoid certain places, I cancel plans last minute, and I obsess over every little bodily sensation, afraid it might lead to another episode. I’ve seen doctors who say it’s “just anxiety,” but that doesn’t make it feel any less terrifying. I keep wondering: what if this is who I am now? What if I never get back to who I used to be?

How do I stop being afraid of my own mind, and start living again?

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Advice from our Doctor of Psychology:

What you’re describing is one of the most difficult—and misunderstood—experiences of living with anxiety. After a panic attack, especially if it was your first, something fundamental shifts: your sense of safety within yourself. You begin to question your body, your sanity, your reality. You start to scan for danger not just outside, but inside your own skin. And perhaps the most frightening thought of all is the one you voiced so clearly: “What if I never go back to the way I was?”

Let me tell you something I’ve said to many people on this same journey: You are not broken. You are scared. And being scared is not a permanent identity—it’s a state. One that can shift. One that you can move through, even if right now it feels like it owns you.

Understand That Anxiety Rewires Perception—But Not Permanently
When we go through a traumatic or overwhelming event like a panic attack, our nervous system becomes hypersensitive. This is not a flaw—it’s your brain trying to protect you from perceived threat. But it often overshoots. You start reacting not just to danger, but to the possibility of danger. That sense of “something’s not right” is your internal alarm stuck in the on position. The good news is that, through consistent and compassionate work, that alarm can be retrained. Your mind can unlearn fear. But the first step is realizing: you’re not crazy. You’re hyper-aware. That’s survivable—and treatable.

Separate the Panic from the Meaning You’ve Given It
Many people experience panic attacks. What turns them into long-term distress is often what we tell ourselves about them. If you’ve started to believe, “I’m not normal anymore,” or “Something’s wrong with me,” your brain reinforces that narrative every time you feel a flutter in your chest or a fog in your thoughts. Begin gently challenging that story. Instead of “I’m losing it,” try: “This is a moment of fear. It’s intense, but it will pass.” Reframing the narrative helps break the loop of fear-about-fear.

Rebuild Safety Within Yourself
Right now, your body feels like a hostile place. So the healing work is about making it feel safe again. Start small. Sit with your hand on your chest, breathing slowly, saying, “I’m safe in this moment.” Practice grounding: press your feet into the floor, look around the room, name five things you see. Each time you do this, you’re gently signaling to your nervous system that the threat has passed. Safety isn’t a switch—it’s a process. But it can be restored.

Allow Grief for Who You Were—And Make Space for Who You’re Becoming
It’s okay to miss your old self. To mourn the ease you once felt. That’s part of healing: grieving what was. But don’t mistake grief for a life sentence. You are still in here. And sometimes, after anxiety forces us to strip away the illusions of invincibility, what emerges is a version of you that is deeper, wiser, and more attuned to what matters. Let this be a turning point, not a tombstone.

Reconnect With the World Slowly and Intentionally
It’s common to shrink your life to avoid panic triggers. But avoidance reinforces fear. Begin reclaiming space gently. If going to a café makes you anxious, start by walking past it. Then stand outside for a minute. Eventually, go in, even if just for five minutes. Keep a “bravery log”—noticing what you tried, how it felt, and what you learned. Progress is not measured by the absence of fear, but by your willingness to keep showing up in the face of it.

Consider Working With a Therapist Who Specializes in Anxiety Disorders
You don’t have to face this alone. A skilled therapist can help you untangle the fears, reprocess the panic memory, and rebuild a sense of safety. Techniques like CBT, somatic work, and exposure therapy can be profoundly effective. It’s not a quick fix, but it’s a real one. Healing is possible. Many people return not just to who they were—but to a fuller, freer version of themselves they never thought possible.

Please remember: what you’re going through is not a life sentence. It’s a chapter. And you are already moving through it—by reaching out, by asking questions, by holding on. You are still here. And you are not alone.

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